Since we needed to get in shape this spring, I signed myself and my husband up for a half marathon (13.1 miles) on June 1st. This means that we must train. Our training schedule involves running various distances at various times. Yesterday we were scheduled to run 4 miles.
When we were kids my father was always trying to teach us something. You know, like most dads, when he was around. He taught me how to make an excellent omelet. I can ride a bike. I can mix an excellent gin and tonic. I can sail. He was also a super boy scout. Not only was he an Eagle Scout as a teen, he grew into the Scout Master as an adult (with various crazy awards etc). So we were always camping and sometimes hiking. Participation in these scout like activities are where I learned the valuable skill I utilized on our run yesterday.
I know (after running high school track) that I can’t eat too soon before I run. However yesterday I figured that a few bites of a PB&J sandwich would do more good than harm (I was afraid of running out of energy).
Oh how I was wrong.
About midway through our run I realized that my belly was all googly (read: not happy with it’s contents). As I have a history of “googly belly” incidents, I have learned to be in tune with what my bowels are singing. In this case it was “sister, you’re not going to make it to a bathroom…haha” (sung to the tune of Garbage’s “Shut Your Mouth”…try not to panic)
With this knowledge firmly in mind, I decide it’s time to spend a few minutes of quality time in that bunch of pine trees. With my husband as the lookout, I fought my way into a fairly dense patch of evergreen trees to take the opportunity that semi-rural living brings…public bathrooms anywhere that you can hide.
My apologies to the residents on Lyford Road whose yard I enjoyed. I’ve been eating a more vegetarian diet, so perhaps it will act as a natural fertilizer for those kind trees.
You might be asking at this point, what did you Dad teach you?
Well, I emerged from that patch of trees clean and remnant free. This is a valuable skill, not just an accident. After my first draft of this post, my husband suggested a diagram to illustrate the technique. Enjoy.
So thank you Dad! Isn’t it great to know that after all these years I am vigorously applying the knowledge that you have shared with us?!




